Because Of You

I will not make the same mistakes that you did
I will not let myself
Cause my heart so much misery
I will not break the way you did,
You fell so hard
I've learned the hard way
To never let it get that far

Because of you
I never stray too far from the sidewalk
Because of you
I learned to play on the safe side so I don't get hurt
Because of you
I find it hard to trust not only me, but everyone around me
Because of you
I am afraid

I lose my way
And it's not too long before you point it out
I cannot cry
Because you know that's weakness in your eyes
I'm forced to fake
A smile, a laugh everyday of my life
My heart can't possibly break
When it wasn't even whole to start with

Because of you
I never stray too far from the sidewalk
Because of you
I learned to play on the safe side so I don't get hurt
Because of you
I find it hard to trust not only me, but everyone around me
Because of you
I am afraid

I watched you die
I heard you cry every night in your sleep
I was so young
You should have known better than to lean on me
You never thought of anyone else
You just saw your pain
And now I cry in the middle of the night
For the same damn thing

Because of you
I never stray too far from the sidewalk
Because of you
I learned to play on the safe side so I don't get hurt
Because of you
I try my hardest just to forget everything
Because of you
I don't know how to let anyone else in
Because of you
I'm ashamed of my life because it's empty
Because of you
I am afraid

Because of you
Because of you

influenced by jaren to take silly quizes.....

Your Brain is 67% Female, 33% Male

Your brain leans female You think with your heart, not your head Sweet and considerate, you are a giver But you're tough enough not to let anyone take advantage of you!

What Gender Is Your Brain?

Your EQ is 147

50 or less: Thanks for answering honestly. Now get yourself a shrink, quick! 51-70: When it comes to understanding human emotions, you'd have better luck understanding Chinese. 71-90: You've got more emotional intelligence than the average frat boy. Barely. 91-110: You're average. It's easy to predict how you'll react to things. But anyone could have guessed that. 111-130: You usually have it going on emotionally, but roadblocks tend to land you on your butt. 131-150: You are remarkable when it comes to relating with others. Only the biggest losers get under your skin. 150+: Two possibilities - you've either out "Dr. Phil-ed" Dr. Phil... or you're a dirty liar.

What's Your EQ (Emotional Intelligence Quotient)?

hahaha this is so dumb. i'm using another new keyboard n mouse now! lols. cuz ytd that wireless keyboard is last time duno buy wat then free de.. then i kp complaining not nice to use then my uncle wants it.. so bro gaf it to him n bpt ANOTHEER set of wireless keyboard n mouse! yay~ finally!! hahaha this one has the normal configuration de!! =) but like the keys not as nice to type lehhh... -_-''' hahaha. i miss huiyu's keyboard!! lol....... =X

boooooooooooooooo. bad mood ytd nite. hahaha. so siannn. why do the both of us haf to be so bothered by the two of them? eeeeeeeks. this keyboard officially sucks. so difficult to type! waahahaha. ok aabit out of pt. =X heeex. hmmmm yea.. mab dun worry so much le k! bert's rite... no point making yourself so miserable over him! just zou yi bu kan yi bu baaa! then there's always bert n i who love u soooooo much!! i an share him with u!! wahahah *hugs* ^^


bleahhhhh. guess some things r juz not meant to be.. so shouldn't think so much and make a big hoo hah out of nothing. hahahhaha. =(

blahhhhhhhh. quite fun ytd.. hahaha. happening~ lazy... slack-ish. hahahah. nua-ish. lols. wat vocab! hahaha.

yeaps. met the dans. hahaha. cool~ fri met 8e sat met dans. hahaha. yeap. blahblahblah. nothing much.. apart from the dramatic sheltering with two pathetic umbrellas on the way to jess hse. lols. then fooled arnd n all tt.. heex.. then left her hse at almost 6, everyone looking so sleepy.. hahaah

then went to bukit panjang plaza to meet ernie. quite stupid. he made me wait so long until 9 then in the end nv buy the cakes!! BLAH!! hahaha. ok nvm~ punishment is dun go out with him today! lollls.

yay. tooday ish a happy day! first day of official use of my new comp! the stupid wireless keyboard so hard to use!! yay. changing soon le~ MUAHAHA. ahahas. n was fooling arnd with bro juz now.. damn funny. then i was so high i started dancing arnd my hse WAHAHAHA. -_-'''

ok,, i shall not sound like mab! -_-'''

hahaha. so coincidentally... the 100TH entry made in my this blog.. is partially dedicated to GAIGAI! lols..

yeap. by the time u reach home after the long day.. n after u've read my card for u.. hopefully u see this too! :) hahaa hopefully u wun take into consideration all the nasty things i said n do in the past few months.. yeap. n yea.. hope tt from today onwards u visit my blog more often to find out abt wat's happening in my life!! =) i love gaigai!!(x100,SC!) ^^ *classical gaigai hug*

__________________________________________________________________________

ok abt life..

ytd was GREATTTTTTTT! met huiyu in the morning to get lost in NTU! wahaha. yeap. went to hand in something ma haha. then yeap. ate @ JP n she went for her lessons n i went to meet the choir peeps!

FINALLY SAW ERLY!!! hahaha. n many photos of her euclyd(forgot how to spell? haha)!! =)) soooooo cute laaaaaaaaaaaa. somebody is super xinfu now!! -jealous- hahaha. oh wells! hopefully my day comes too. which means 6more girls must get married first. bcuz i wanna be bridesmaid for all 6 of them!! so i cannot get married first. HAHA. but according to superstitions.. a girl cannot be bridesmaid for more than 3 times.. or else zi ji jia bu chu qu le. WAHAHA. watever lo~ -_-'''

yeap. went back to cchs choir for reuben's farewell party! they shifted n renovated choir room!!!! -DOUBLY JEALOUS- wahahaha. win liao loooo. how cannnnnnnnnnnnn. lols. then yeap. 5 generations of choir singing Dorven Dalai together !! WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!! super high.... although i totally like forgot half the thing liao n cannot reach so many soprano notes.. -_-''' but NVM. IT WAS FUNNNNNNNNNNN!!! =D oh mannnnnnnn.. i miss the good old days! hahaha. so sadddd. we went to walk arnd sch after tt.. then they sang SALMO!! n we missed ittttttt. arghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. how could we have missed salmo!! blahhhhh. hahah nvm not like i can reach nwae.. but would have been fun! hahaha. n ya.. we kena nagged BY THE STUPID VPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP!!! >=(
"r u'all ex students? come back to visit issit?"
"ya.."
"nxt time u'all come back can u'all wear..... erm. more? we still haf your very young juniors u know.........."
!#@$#!$E%%^@!%!
WTH. ultimate buay song-ness(EC?)!!!! bleahhhhhs. stupid vp. blacklisted by me le. wahaha
yeap then saw yazeed!! ^^ n cnnt find marcus kuek as usual. out of 5times i go back i only found him 1 time. hahaha. so siannnnn.

yea~ then chatted with reuben n stuff.. then went to parkway meet the rest of the 8es except yt! :)) happy gatheringggggg!! (kuai le de ju hui? lols.) really very very very very VERY happy ytd! yayyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! :))

hahaha n thanks bert n mab for unofficially escorting me home! =)) lols.

yayyyyyyy. happy ytd. n happy today-to-come!! ^^

hahaha chatting with reuben now! LALALA. so cool~ i realise tt coming online at those ungodly hours..entitle u to chat with ppl u haven't chatted with for a LONG LONG time.

like ytd... =)

heeeex. wat more can i say? i'm just very very happy! can't stop smiling! (: lalalaaaaaaaaa~ duno why also.. guess it's a big load off my shoulder now.. finally found out wat i've always wanted to know, regardless of whether it turns out to be good or bad.. at least i have an answer now! lalalaaaaaa.

-happy happy girl-
:)

haha no bert i'm not obsessed over her laa. lols. juz happy tt finally we're talking again. n juz.... =X haha cannot say here! lols.

yayyyyyyy. so happy to be able to talk to the person i talked to today morning! hahaha. =D *grins* yay yay yayyy. can't say who or wat we talked about. promised to kp a BIG secret. but yeap... so happy. finally found out wat i wanted to know after so long! (:so funny to be able to talk lidat after so long. but yeap.. happy happy!! (: hope everyone will be happy! :)

nwae.. am back from my ex tuition teacher's hse! hahaha. wanted to treat her for lunch.. but she ask me go her hse so she can cook for me!! ^^ ahahahs. yeaps. then chatted quite abit.. talked abt bgr n GOD n other stuff.. hahaha. no i'm not criticising anyone or anything.. juz dun like it when ppl talk to me about religious stuff haha. but oh wells~ it was nice chatting with her.. learnt alot! :) ok now i know how to pick my nxt bf! hahahahhaha! :)

yay yay yay. really very happy today! =D


although i'm super bored again now................... zzz.

HAHA. of all ppl.. guess who i'm chatting with?? phewwwww. at last... "mi di yi jing jie kai le.." =)

boooo. so bored. noone to gb with! kena trashed by some stranger in the afternoon! wahaha. bahhhhhhhhhh. bored bored BORED!! =[

hahaha! talked to jieru last nite!! wooooooooo... cools~ hahaha. so fascinated by wat's happening in her life all this time.. =) actually fascinated is juz a nice word to cover up for something else. hahaha~ nvm... secret! *shhhhhhhhhhhh* ;)

lalalaaaaaaaa. someone entertain meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

how come not a single sensible soul is online! =X

blahblahblah! yayyyy~ tmr onwards can go out le!! hahaha. say until i not allowed to go out lidat.. haha juz tt i dowan go out ma. =X watever~ so bored tt i'm blogging boliao stuff ahahas. :p

make a guess at wat i'm doing!! n u'll know how bored i am...... zzz.

DOWNLOADING GUNBOUND!! omggg. wahaha

hahaha. i'm juz blogging for the sake of blogging again. wahahha. ok first things first.. REPLY TAGS!!

mab: yea.. i agree... SHEESHHHHHHHHHH!
bert: hahaha ya tts carl's junior! yummmeeeyyyyyyyyyyy!! :p
jun: =)
jess: (=
ernie: cnnt be bothered to reply u le wahahaha. same joke u kp telling so many times not funny lo. hahahha

okkk. i muz go n update my friendster profile one day! willy juz emailed me... n he went "Judging from your friendster pictures, you've found a boyfriend to share your life with huh?" omggggg. r my photos THAT misleading?? hahahhahah. ook. i betta update them soon. but i'm so lazy n cnnt b bothered with friendster now! zzz.. see how ba.. ahahas.

blahhhh. so bored. got mood later then blog somemore ba. so tired. gtg do the dishes LALALA. ^^

PROJECT SUPERSTAR 2006!!

Audition Venue
Toa Payoh HDB Hub

Bookmark these dates!
Male Auditions: Sat, 2 Sept, 9am
Female Auditions: Sat, 16 Sept, 9am

Participation Criteria
Singapore Citizen or Permanent Resident
Holders of Work Permit or Student Pass

So if you want to become the next top selling platinum record artiste, here's your chance! Registration is free! Bookmark www.channelu.com.sg for more details on registration coming up soon!


muahahaha. bet alot of ppl r interested in this! so i'm just doing free advertising n providin information for ppl interested. wahahahha. so lame~ lalala. i'm off to watch tv!! hahaha guys auditions r on my bdae!! boooo hooooooooooooooooo. means i got even lesser ppl to celebrate my bdae with me! hahaha cuz all will flock down to toa payoh hdb hub. hahaha nvm. shall haf celebrations with the gals then. nah. they'll flock down to support the guys too. hahahah! ok duneed celebrate bdae le. might as well go support the guys too. wahahah. watever~ lalala TV TIME!! =)

hahaha see i kp blogging show how bored i am. blahh.

juz watched the 'kiss' mtv again. hahaha. still so nice... -awwwwwwwwww-

n CERTAIN korean dramas r as nice as my darling hk serials! muahahaha.

some ppl just dun get it... dun they??

i've never blocked anyone in my entire life. not even jieru when we quarrelled. dun make me start blocking now.

yayyyy. i chatted w jieru last nite! =)

yayyyyy. i quarrelled w my ex last nite! -_-'''

oh wells. might as well. i dun understand wat's the problem with guys. can't they be more normal?? n i dun understand how u can do so many things n forget all abt them. n i dun understand how u can do something so wrong n push the entire blame to ur gd fren. 7yrs of friendship n all u took was 10min to ruin it. yah. dun worry i'm not saying it's ur fault. everything is MY fault rite? some ppl juz refuse to think with their numbskull. when the whole world crumbles on them, t's always the other person's fault yea? it doesn't matter if they have stm n cannot rmb wat they do. it's juz not their fault they cannot rmb anything. it's the other person's fault for rmb-ing it so clearly yea? wooo hoooo~ watever. pls dun call me when u read this. i dun ever wanna talk to u again.

lalala~

yayyyyy. went out with ernie huiyu n stella ytd! hahaha. so funnnn! we ate 'niu de hai zi'! hahaha. n we saw alot of ppl whose 'ge ge yao chu guo le'. wahahaahaha. lame~ blahblahblah. watever. so sian. huiyu n stella so sian. then ernie n i so enthu want go shopping. hahahha. okk. at least ernie bot something. poor me. try everything... either i dun like or those i love dun haf my size!! boo boo. -wails-

yay. one step each n we're nearer to friends again! :)

haha ok reply tags first...
jun: yeap. thanks! i'll be happy... dun worry abt me.. i guess i've made up my mind alrdy... =)
bert: okok dun cry. wo ai ni bi ai johnny depp duo yi dian dian.. hahaha
mab: haha u want flower juz copy n paste from my blog can le.. ok we go trim one day this wk? i wanna rebond my ends!
ernie: u got hair to cut meh? :p

***

hahaha ok. things r getting slightly weird recently. hahahaha. =X

yayyyyy. kbox ytd w lj bert hx!! duper funnnn!! =D although started out very nan ting-ly. hahaha ask bert!! i zao xia like duno wat. wahahahhaa. lalalalalaaaaaaaaaa~ so happpppy!! sing 5hrs still not enough.... i still wanna singggg!! :) n i still suck with duets... =(( then walked arnd ps with lj mab ernie! muahahahaaas. =) yayness!!(ec) happy dayyyyyyyyyyyy! :))

mab pls call me later if u r free!! :)

***

abt nxt sat:
jess... ernie DEMANDS tt u ask him along. the rest of the dans.... erm. i tink i shld be going ba.. haha. pls help me be strong. n pls dun scold me if i really leave halfway... blahs! (ehhh... dun tink will happen ba? HOPEFULY. haha) [tis para sounds like a prayer... -_-''''] hmmm yeap. i still wun know wat to say or do.. blahhh. sounds weird. then i go for wat hor? bleahhhhh. =(

oooooh. mab dun be sad le! u'll get to enjoy ursself soon! :))

ohhhhh. was looking thru' my comp files... like deleting n sorting out certain stuff... then came across this..
'something happened between u n huiting arhx'
'Er..dunoe leh..inbr dun like her or wad la..i find her beri gdgd wan.think is she dun like me ba..dunoe leh..i hab a feelin she like dun wan tok to me like dat'
09:17:19pm
13-07-2004
look at the date!! can u believe it?? ancient yrs ago le!! hahaha. so funny thinking abt the past.. the silly me.. but i nv regretted that falling for that idiot n blah. hahaha. it marked one of the sweetest memories of my life.. =) oh wells~ funny to tink of it.. i've like totally lost touch with him now.. hahaha. wonder wat would things have turned out like if i confessed my feelings... hahaha. oh wells. dou shuo shi wonder liao.. wun happen.. so might as well dun wonder! ahahas. but then... he IS sweet watttt. HAHA. =))

yeap. saw many other convos n blogs n all tt stuff too... but yea.. this was the most interesting one.. lols.

yayyy. cleared my shelves today... threw away more stuff. wahaha.. prevernt cluttering... cluttering is unhealthy! :p muz make space for the new academic yr! :)

speaking of new academic yr... received email from hss today. seems like 4august is going to be a super packed day! n orientation wk is not going to be as slack as i expected.. =(( ok i better spend the next few days settliing more of my uni stuff. cannot drag le!! =X n i haven't went shoppingggggggggg!! :(( n i nid to trim my hair!! blahhhh. i look so ugly nowadays. =(

i love johnny depp!! :)

***

blahh! ytd was funn!! met up with huiyu in the afternoon so she can go her shopping... then evening met up with rest of the dans n andy n baba n went for dinner @ sizzler! hahaha. quite nice.. =) nxt time i'll juz haf the salad bar...wahaha. ok nxt time zai shuo ba... it was So great meeting up with all of them n chatting n catch up n all that stuff... =))

***

but i guess my spirits got dampened towards the day of the day ba.. cuz tinking of jieru n all tt stuff... yeap. maybe it's really time to face her again. but i can't help feeling weird n got those 'bu xiang de yu gan' about meeting her again. haix... i guess it's just me ba... but seriously i duno how am i going to face her.. all the nasty words exhanged when i was angry n all tt.. it suddenly seems weird. n the thought of meeting her brought back all the awful memories last nite... the whole thing. have i really put the whole thing past me? arggh. feel so horrible. nearly cried on my way home last nite. :( everyone can put down the whole thing n forgive her alrdy...but i'm still so hesitant abt meeting her... wat's wrong with me?? blahh! i noe deep down i still want the fren but i duno if i'm ready... i really duno how to face her n talk to her... wat am i supposed to say?? blahh. but i really wanna see an old fren n find out how she's doing... know how she feels abt the whole thing n all tt too.... so why am i hesitating?? i'm supposed to be strong rite? bleahs. =(( this is so screwed up. wth is wrong with me???

***

i hate sas guys. wth is their problem?? is there a need to tell the whole world wat u do?? very fun issit?? so nice to hao lian issit?? stupid bigheads irritating ignorant selfish jerks. they never ever spare a thought for others before they open their mouths, do they?? >=( i absolutely cnnt stand sas guys!! WTH IS THEIR PROBLEMMMMMMMMMMMMM!!! urrrgh. n it's not just ONE sas guys. it's TWO freaking sas guys. no i'm not talking abt who u tink i'm talking abt. blahs. nvm. haha. u dun hafta know who i'm talking abt. urrrrrgh. selfish moronic bastards. wthhhh!!! blahhh. u guys better not offend me again or else i'm so gonnaaa................... what? what am i even supposed to do? blahh! whateverrrrrrr. juz cnnt be bothered. esp. by ONE OF THEM. ok at least the other one apologised. but if he hadn't apologised i would have slapped him hard. wat's HIS problem>??? -_-'''

***

hahah there's gotta be better things to do then spending my hols worrying abt an old fren n scolding two stupid sas guys? blah!

*awwwwwwwww.... whoever says hk serials can nv be sweet n nice as korean! hahaha... =)

hahahaha... ytd was a totally blur day!! -_-'''

went to meet mab in the afternoon.. so she can eat her MACs. -_-''' then walked arnd n after tt went town to meet my colleagues they'all!

ahahahas. i went taka first help them get timesheets from the agency... then they at far east eating.. so i wanted go find them.. then i walk... n walk happily. n then uh-oh. why am i standing infront of somerset mrt........ -_-''' -blushblush- yessss i got lost again. hahahhaa. then i called for help. i mean use hp call, not stand there n call -_-'''' duh. yeap. then finally walked back to far east sweating... =X then yeap met them n blah. so nice... talking n laughing.. muahahas.

then we went to watch pirates!!!!!! woooooooooooooooooooooo~ it's the best movie i've seen for ages besides carsssss~!!!! yay yay yayyyyy!! PPL PLS GO N WATCH!!! it's damn hilarious!! i luagh until i going to fall from the chair le... it's damn funny laaa..... hahahah. then after the show we sit there so long waiting for the credeits to finnish rolling... which is damn long. cuz heard alot ppl say after credits got show part 3... then in the end.. only show one scene that is not even related to part 3 -_-''''' hahahahha. but still.... THE MOVIE IS SUPER NICEEEEEEEEE!!!! ^^

okkk going out again later!! lalalaa~ so tired!! same slping hrs as ytd again!! =(

okkkk. as u can see.... i'm UBER bored to be blogging here at such a time of the day! hahaha

it's nice to slp late. but point being i can't slp well! hahaha. sadness(1/2 EC)! bahhhhhs. fell aslp at 1+ then woke up at 7+.. how bad is tt? hahaha siannnnnnnned(got EC?)

blahs. blahblahblah. i'm so bored now. n there's not a single soul online i can chat with. blahs! waiting for time to c..r..a..w..l.............. then i can go out!!! ^^ ahahahas.

gonna meet mab for lunch later! ahahhas. actually i ate nissin chilli crab juz now.. i tink i abit crazy. 2days ago diarrhoea now eat chilli crab. wawhahha. watever~ see i blog this type of stuff then know i ultra bored le. muahaha. bahhhhhhhh. okk then gg down town to watch PIRATES!! :)) n i haven't even watched the curse of the black pearl before! oh wells. hahaha

tmr might meet debbie n the rest in the afternoon to go see yeti's baby first then go meet the dans or something. yayness(EC)!! so long nv see them all le!! =D lalalaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa~

i want to sing kbox!! i miss singing kbox!! hahahaha. kboxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx!! countdown to kbox: TWO DAYS!! woooo hoooooooo~

ok i shld change my wish list liao.. hahaha. ok let's see.... i might want a new pair of specs, i want tt purple nike bag i saw at queensway! n i want new lingerie!!!! wahahahha.... wat else? the puma jacket can strike off... then esprit perfume still considering... hahaha. sport shoes bot le... flats mayb keep a lookout for.. did i miss anything else? oh belt i bot le.. juz tt not so nice.. normal de.. no crown.. might consider the crown one though, cuz i know where to get it le... hahaha. n ehhh? wat else. hahaha. erms. uhhhhh. ok tts all i guess... go add to my list now!! lalalaaa~

woooo i shld do a mask now too since i haf the time!! bahs. -bored girl entertaining herself- lols. ciaooooooooooooo~ ^^

yayyyyy. yati gif birth to baby boy lee!! ^^ i want go see!! hahaha...

woooo... i'm in singing mood nowww. been singing the whole afternoon! huiyu i want go kbox!! :(

yay!! i'm finally recovering!! :) ytd was like helll.

first i diarrhoea-ed. then i lie down to rest. then i diarrhoeaed again. n after tt i puked. like i haven't even eaten anything for the day n i juz puke. then i eat the stupid por cheh yeeeee. juz swallowed down the water n i puked the whole thing out. puke n puke n puke. diarrhoea-ed n diarrhoea-ed n diarrohea-ed. by the time i stand up n look into the mirror, gosh. i was sweating like i juz ran 2.4, n my whole face is ASHEN white. then i see stars..... then i tried to sit down... but *bingbongbiang* buckets made way for me n i was lying there the nxt moment looking at this moth on the ceiling. hahaha. cool huh? for awhile i didn't dared to move.. then i look at the toilet door. shit. i locked it. wat if i can't get up myself?? moved a bone. ok everything fine. stood up. got out. called mummy. she couldn't leave work immediately. so she ask me go master bedroom n lie down first. cuz there nearer to toilet. then bro cnnt come back too cuz got stuff to do. blahs. so i lie there. afraid to eat or drink anything. slp, wake up, watch tv. -repeat- for like 5hrs. then i got damn hungry. wanted to get something to eat. n i walked to the kitchen. n started seeing stars again. held onto the sliding door for support. *bingbongbiang* the sliding door closed after me. hahaha. bingo. i fainted for the 2nd time. home ALONE. how cool is tt. now i bruised my thigh. ahahas. not so scary this time le. got up myself n went back to room. mummy came home. lemme drink cereal. took cab to clinic. food poisoning. suggested walking back. cuz i like better le. wrong choice. started paling like 100m away from home. had to sit down once in awhile to tk a breather. felt quite bad. i'm like one head taller than my mum, n she had to fu wo. =( then before i entered the door, those irritating stars entered my vision again. faster sit down once i approached the armchair. -phew- escaped the third bingbongbiang. ahhas. watch tv slack ate abit watch tv... slp.

felt better when i woke up today morning... infact, SO MUCH BETTER!! ahahas. =)) hope i get to go out tmr nite! :)

yada yada. i yam sadd.

first day away from work.. n i'm sick!! :((

woke up in the morning with the intention of gg swimming. then i rushed to the toilet n start excreting. blahs! then after tt i felt so weak i had to plop down on the armchair n stone. n my tummy is damn painful n i feel like puking. then i get up n move i'll start seeing stars. bleah!! got the medicated oil. slightly better noww. ok i can't sit typing. gotta lie down before i puke over my keyboard. bahhs. bad start to hols. :(( n i can't find the por jie yeeeeeeee.... hahaha bao jian wan laa. so i'm going to shrivel up in the armchair or something.

yada yada. i'm gonna be a strong gal. blahs! gorgor....wat time u coming homeeeeeeeee :((

bahs! beavan dun do anything stupid. or i'l never ever talk to u again. [tone: non-pmsing.]

blahblahblah. i'm juz not ready to face her. n i dun see why i shld force myself to be ready when i'm smply not ready. will only make things worse rite? n it doesn't help that somebody is telling her everything. thanks huh.

*-*

went to nydc with ernie n beav juz now! hahaha. ernie is super lame... side joke: gimme 10 gimme 10!! ^^ ahahas. ate new zealand icecream! lalalas. =)) nice day... although i was having quite a case of pms-ing. hahaha. nvm. i got the whole wk to throw tantrum at myself at home! wahahaha cools~

lalalaaaaaaa. so siannnn. eyes abit pain. later go drip eyedrop! MUAHAHA!

bleahhh. was a very happy wk.. then i came back n decided to read blogs before i blog. then i read jess blog. n i feel so rotten now. feel like cryingg. :(( i guess all the dans will always miss the old her.. no matter what, she has walways been a part of us, n someone who cared for us n we cared for... reading jess blog took me a walk down memory lane.. both the happy n sad lanes. i really miss the old fren i guess... but was browsing thru' my sms on a long train ride juz now.. n saw an sms jess sent me at tt period of time.. she said she didn't want her to think that she can be so easily forgiven everytime she blunders... true enough.. but have we all been angry for too long? wat if she nv takes the initiative...does tt mean up to the day i lie in my coffin i still wun get to relieve the good old classical gaigai hugs?

jess.. u tink too highly of me le ba.. u always think i'm not at fault regarding the whole issue.. but i guess i wasn't a good gf at that time too.. maybe that was wat gaf him an excuse to have a change in heart... sure..u can ask me to shout it out loud, n i'll tell u.. i really loved him.. but loving him n being a spoiled brat are two different matters. i guess i was too ba dao in some ways n tt made him tired to carry on with the dumb sotong gal. mayb tts why he thinks i took him for granted.. i duno... n i dun really gif a damn anymore... too tired. perhaps this break was a gd thing afterall...made me see the scary n ugly side of him...

nwae... thanks jess.. i really treasure my frendship with u too! al though we hardly haf time to meet.. there r times when i'll think abt the silly days @ SA when u try to rape the rest of the dans with pork... hahaha. then i will laugh to myself like some idiot.. =))

n i miss the rest of the dans too! can't wait for thursday to come!! :))

blahs. in a really saddening mood now.. but i guess i'll try to blog abt the rest of the wk to attempt to cheer myself up!! haha. =)


heex.. the whole wk juz went pass in a blur!! haha.. first of all..i suddenly became this VIP at work. hahaha. as in not guest of honour type of VIP... but do alot of sai gang de VIP.. -_-''' hahaha. stupid josie.. make me stay back for ot practically everyday.. n ask me to do SO MANY things. i kp walking to n fro her table zzz... damn tired when i reach home everyday!! then he just popped a bomb on shirley n i on wed n told us 2new gals coming on thurs n we suppose to coach them. -_-''' so thurs was my busiest day @ SP ever! hahaha. the new gal is ok i guess.. haha but haven't learnt everything la.. handing her over to bernard.. not my fault ma!! really no time to coach.. hahaha

tues after work went topshop with shirley to get her shorts.. then went up to kino c uz both of us wanted buy books.. then the book i wanted to buy cnnt find! in the end the staff dug out two kiam chye copies for me.. but obviously i wanted one i better condition? haha so she helped me call to reserve a copy @ taka branch. went down on wed after work to get it.. n it's still untouched. haha cuz still trying to read shirley's book finish le then can retuen her asap! :)

then thurs nite went to eat @ newton food centre there.. yana n i's treat!! yana, for her first pay..n me, for my last pay! lols. n we silly-ly didn't know it'll be so ex.. so we bot like 50 each only... n in the end eat ontil like.. over $150?? hahaha. cuz there target tourists de ma.. hahaha. then yea the rest forked out some money each but we paid them back on fri of cuz.. heex.. nvm the money.. i was truly really the happiest gal tt evening!! :)) so many ppl came for the dinner!! all the temps except the 2new girls n yp, yana, weiling n patrick, DEBBIE!! :D that totals up to 11 ppl!! haha.. really like reunion dinner lo.. so happy!! ^^ gawd i really didn't realised how much i missed debbie until i saw her!! :)) yayyyy~ am going her hse one of these days before sch starts! heex..

then we went town after dinner.. n yw say want go paragon collect something.. then we ended up stuck there cuz got this charity auction then ALOT of celebrities came!! so we stand there drooling like idiots @ this SUPER HOT guyyyy. hahaha. ok there was only one or two hot guys.. but the guys feast their eyes like duno wat... so many chiobus!! :p then i didn't even realise clara n debbie MIA until i finish drooling. hahaha. then they say they went to look for their fren who's working there.. haha. so we walked arnd looking at those perfumes n stuff.. then fooled arnd, with yw being the joker as usual... haha. then debbie n clara suddenly reappeared with MY PRESENT. omgggggggg. i was damn stunned n touched laa. ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. :):):) wasn't even expecting it!! hahaha. n guess wat they bot? giordano JUNIOR. hahaha like thanks~ lol. but quite nice laa heex.. shirt n jacket.. heex.. tts my THIRD giordano jacket le zz... but nvm i still love them!! as in ALL OF THEM cuz everyone shared! heex.. ok i can strike off the puma jacket on my list le.. duneed buy le.. hahaha.

then fri was a very happy n cheery day too! heex.. n YP SAID I AM CUTE. omggg. i laugh until i fell down. WAHAHAHA. then yana n i asked josie to help us buy breakfast for everyone on sat morning.. hahaha. cuz tt day thurs nv treat the boss n the perms ma.. so abit weird.. then if dun buy for the temps oso very weird.. so buy for everyone lo.. hahaha! n i spent almost two hours at nite writing n drawing cards for them! hahaha. n i am pissed with gungun. cuz everything i do for them or they do for me, he wipes up all the thoughtfulness n effort with his stupid wet blanket. i seriously felt like strangling him? haha u finally figured out why i kp scolding u? lols.

nwae... yeap. today was a happy day too!! :D breakfast!! hahaha then gaf out my cards to them!! n they were all quite happy i guess.. heex :) n i was quite touched when clara said she slept at 3am but crawled out of bed juz to eat my breakfast!! :)) i guess i'm really really gonna miss each n everyone of them there! haha even yp for her stupid antics. hahahha. then when i was leaving they very funny. coincidentally everyone was arnd.. then they were like standing arnd waving to me n wishing me all the best n blah. hahaha. like some celebrity lidat.. n i promised yati to come back to kk to see her baby when she delivers!! :)) n tt was the end of a close to 7mnths service @ SP Halifax! ^^

walked arnd with shirley n yana while we waited to meet our respective ppl.. hahaha. nothing much.. yana bot me a tee shirt!! :)) heex.. then shirley n i were damn funny.. cuz she was heading home n i was heading to commonwealth to meet my mum.. then we conveniently forgot.. n tot as usual we were taking the opp direction de trains.. cuz she lives at boon lay.. hahaha. then we went down to the platform n her train came.. so we hurriedly hugged n say our byes before she entered the train.. then suddenly i rushed after her n went "heyyyyy. i'm taking towards the west tooooo!!" hahahahaaa. lame! :p

met mummy!! went queensway finally... n bot our sports shoessssssss!!! :)) yayyyy. i got nice nice sports shoes now!! hahaha. FINALLY. wanting to get a new pair for super long le.. hahaa. she bot running shoes. but i bot cross-training. haha. cuz dun tink i'll be running so much nwae... n wanted to buy casual ones.. but in the end think think still decided to buy abit better quality de juz in case... hahah.. i have prettttaaay shoes now!! ^^ n then we went to AV for early dinner!! omggggggg. how i miss the days! hahaha. going AV with dans.. n tt time go dabao for CS peeps! :)) heex.. we eat until damn full laaa. ordered so much! :) then came back to paris shopped abit more then went home.. hahaha happy dayyy! =D

omgggg. such a long entry! hahaha.. but yeaaa. i'm so gonna stop myself from thinking so much! hahaha.

here's the deal for the following wk:
sun/16july-meet beav, n hopefully cindy
mon,tues/17,18july-call up miss wee, party world, ntu finance, slack at home. [haha nvm if u'all dun understand.. for my own reference de. lols.]
wed/19july-pirates of the carribean @ cine with colleagues!
thurs/20july-meet dans, baba, andy!
fri/21july-planning to meet debbie!
sat/22july-kbox with bert they'all!

=))

okkk... to show tt i'm a victim of boredom n under the influence of mab n bert... i shall do this too!


Rules of the game:
1. Post 10 weird/random stuff about yourself.
2. At the end, list the names of 5 people whom you want next to do this, and leave a comment "YOU ARE TAGGED!" in their blog and tell them to read your blog for rules.


ONE::
my best gal fren is mab! n my best GAY fren is GUNGUN!!! wahahhahaha... he is so going to kill me. lols.

TWO::
i haf stage fright! n it gets worse as it grows older! there was this once i took part in some inter-class poem recital thingy @ pri2.. then the poem is 'The Kelong'. so we wore our swimming costumes up to stage n recited the poem n got 2nd! hahaha. then after that we chased the guys wearing the swimming costume n they actually RAN AWAY. omgg. i'll die if u mk me do tt now. lol. n sec1 we had this choral reading comp.. then we hafta wear tails up on stage n blah. n i was a teeny bit scared. then came j1 we had to do oral presentation for pw...n i nearly freaked out! wahaha. long story sia~

THREE::
i have TWO ex! haha ppl think i haf only one... lalala~ not exactly something to b proud of.. =X

FOUR::
i want four children nxt time!! 2boys, 2 girls!! boys preferably the elder ones.. then can pamper their little sisters!! ^^

FIVE::
i used to tk swimming lessons in pri sch! n i HATED them. then i got gold, n failed my gold star. then quit swimming to study.. now i miss swimming like crazy!! hahaha

SIX::
i miss school! but i'm dreading uni!! hahaha. miss the carefree days @ cchs... singing at the balcony... fooling arnd.. having crazy crushes n blahh. wahaha

SEVEN::
my first crush in cchs is ROYCE! *shhhhhh* n my first crush in sa is FUJIN! *double shhhhhh* -blush blush- ppl pls brainwash urself after reading! lols.

EIGHT::
i hate geography. n i love elit. dun ask me why i took double maths. wahahha

NINE::
i still miss jieru from time to time. but i still dun like her. hahaha. -tragic irony- :((

TEN::
i used to be a prefect during pri3! but i hated doing duty during recess.. so i quit in pri4... wahahaha.. so dumb riteee? :D


yayyyyy. ppl whoever want to do just do!! hahaha. yayyyy tt was funnn! ^^

okk.. i shall be a gd girl n listen to mab n stop all the nonsense.. yay. hahaha. besides, i'm blogging wat i feel.. if u dun like to see, dun see n get out. dun spoil my mood. yay~ [in case some ppl can't detect tone.. this para is typed with a -cnnt b bothered- tone]

blahblahblah.

wooooooooo.... beginnng to feel that i'm gonna miss the office n it's ppl when i leave! blahsss. :(( okk but i'm still having trouble with my menteeeeeeeeee. blahs! haha i the rest like cnnt be bothered with her leh... scared i go liao nobody teach her or check her work then she jialat lo... so many mistakes everyday.. when boss finds out she gets even worse scolding... kp telling her duno muz ask le..but she still nv ask me anything?? hahaha. how to teachhhhhhhhh.

n oh yah bert... i'm not free this wkend too!! hahaha. how abt another day? or u got wkday free? i go with u! lols. n oh yah.. we better start planning chalet le!! hahaha. oh yah i got party world voucher leh.. but until end of july only!! hahaha. booooooos. =X

lalalaaaaaaaa. i'm still pissed! hahaha.

okkk. gonna go clear my inbox le. 42mails!! tts crazy..... hahaha

tada peepsss!! :))

cindy: haha okkk!! u want go out wif beav n i ths wkend? :))
ernie: bleah! =X

somebody: whether i took him for granted or not u noe it best.. even if i did, at least i still loveD him while it lasted. n i didn't go girl-hopping.


i'm juz super pissed with someone. not i want to be pissed with someone. but someone is making US damn pissed. i noe some ppl think i'm bad. but i can't be bothered. if i dun be bad, i will nv be happy. blahs.

wowwwwwwww. so long nv blog for someone who is supposedly at home with no hwk everyday! hahah!! :))

ohhhhh. i've been quite busy this wk actually!! hahaha. cuz ALOT of work to do.. so ot everydayy. sadness(mian qiang EC..)!! hahhaa. n i'm SO pek chek. my mentee is still making so many mistakes n i haven't even impart everything to her!! :( n only teach her basics she alrdy mk so much mstakes how to continue impart the rest of the cheem stuff to her?? bleahs. i very scared haven't finish teahcing then thrwo her there alone le lehh. bleahs. am i tt bad a teacher or wat?? :(( bleahhhhh. no wonder i can nv be a teacher! oh wells. hahahah. watever~ but even shirley heard me telling her wat to do le maaa. then i still hafta check her work after she finish everytime.. n i spend more time editing her work than doing my own work zzz.... bleahs. ok i dun wanna be a teacher nxt time. obviously i dun haf the patience! hahaha. =X

ok before i forget.. i shld blog abt this thing tt happened last sat... HAHA.
bert: why r u my exxxxxxxx.....
mab: bcuz i'm pretty.
bert: why r u not my exxxxxx.....
me: bcuz i'm prettier.
mab: why r u my exxxxx.....
bert: bcuz i'm handsome.
mab: why r u not my ex.......
ernie: bcuz i'm handsome-r.
HAHA. suppose to be some stupid private joke. but yea.. u can understand then understand, cnnt understand then dun bother finding out. wahahaha. nwae the bottomline being, ernie n i r cuter than mab n bert. MUAHAHAHAAA. diao... -_-''' dots. so lame~ hahaha.

okkk. so life's been pretty boring for the past wk. cuz after work i'm so tired i juz go home, bathe, eat, watch tv, slp. hahaha. repeat routine. lalalaaaa. =X

ooooh. yx came to my hse on thurs!! :D hahah! so happpppy! so long nv see her le!! she's so cute. n she's so naughty!! n she cries damn loud. hahahha. n her head looks damn funny. i tink her head is quite big seriously... =X doesn't tt sound familiar? like... brandon lye familiar?? HAHAHA. -no offense- :p

yeap. went to pluck eyebrow with yana n shirley @ bugis st ytd after work. cuz they say there got alot of shops then all quite cheap de. then we went after work like 12+ only one shop open -_-''' too early le? hahaha. so juz went in lo... n the person is not very skilled lehhh. n i tink it's quite painful, which isn't suppoed to be... hahaha. n i look weird now! so i'm not going back there!! wahahhah. :p

then went to meet ernie n yuyu @ town to go singing!! went partyworld!!! woooo hoo... :D so long nv sing le... yayyyy!! :)) it's cheaper than kbox laa, but the cushion not very nice to jump on leh... hahaha. lame~ n the food not very nice too... n the thing juz switches off itself when time's up which is super sad cuz cnnt sing on n cheat their money!! wahahaaaaaaaa. -_-'''' lols. then went to eat SUBWAY again. lol. then uhhh ernie went off. n yuyu n i went walking arnd. yayyy! nice dayyyyy. :D i still wanna go kbox again another day!! sing de bu gou shuanggggggg. hahahha! :p

lalalaaa. might go out with mum later! haha see how first lo... :)) buy shoes!!


bahhhhh. actually i've been thinking abt jieru for the past few days. hahah. quite weird. i also duno why.. but the jieru i thinking abt was the one before the big thing happened. like how we used to spend all the happy times together strutting up n down the school hand in hand... the first smile we flashed each other at the jacob ballas studio.... the endless toilet outings. the equally ear-piercing shrieks we have.. how we took turns tearing our ligaments n helping each other around sch after tt... n the time we went for the home visit, n i watched her silently as she taught this old lady how to dance very patiently, then was quite touched but i juz kept quiet. i guess there r times when i still miss the old gaigai... the caring one... n the happy times we spend together. n then i snap back to reality, n i can hardly believe how much she changed. hmmmm.

it's all quite weird. sometimes i'll try to tink back to the old times. the happier times with him. but i realise i can't rmb much alrdy. i duno why. memories with gaigai r still fondly etched in my heart. but memories with him r juz...vague? i duno... maybe huiyu's rite.. i tend to treasure friendship more than relationships. or maybe it's just i haven't seen her for too long or duno wat she's doing.. so i dun get so disgusted with she's doing n blah. maybe it's just a part of me tt dowan to rmb n can't be bothered to rmb anymore. bleahs. i tink it's the first reason ba. hahaha. watever~ i guess it's no longer impt! :)) wat matters now is tt i'm happy with the life i'm leading now! hahaha.

hmmmm. myabe one day we will start talking again... but it definitely wun be soon... maybe one day all the wounds will heal.. but yea.. i guess we all need time.. but i'm certain that i'll never fall in love with him again. period. (:

wooooo... since i'm so bored n am taking a break from watching hk serials, i shall reply tags! hmmm haven't done tt for quite a while! hahaha. =))


yuyu: huh y suddenly say dotty is nice guy? hahah. yah. i'm seeing dots.......................... -_-'''
bert: haha it seriously looked like jerk thai what... heex... oh u want help me slap ar? hahaha. cool~ jp got so many things to buyyyy!! :D
ernie: hahaha yess. ttz why i say muz bite the shoe. hahaha! oooh. LALALA~
dotty: hahaha u owe me so much salary still want me to cont' be ur clown wor! hahaha... i dowan. i want to breach contract!! heex..
beavan: hahaha bu shi shuo yao slap jiu ke yi slap de.... u KAM GONG. wahahahha....
yuyu: hahah yesss. ur bdae same as my bro!! woooo hooooooo~ lols. n same as deng xiao ping!! wahahhahahhah..... coool~


lalala. back to my hk serials! :))

okkk suddenly realise very long nv play this type of things le! wahahhaa... relieve the gd ol' friendster days!! :))


Favourite Colour(s): pink & black!! :)) n green n baby blue n blahblahblah! wahaha. everything is niceeeeeeee
Favourite Food: cheesecake! tt's the only thing in mind now...cuz tts the yummiest thing i ate ytd. wahaha!
Favourite Song: erm alot? hahaha.
Favourite Movie: haha i duno!! so many!! most recent will be CARS!! lalalla~ so childish! hahha
Favourite Sport: ermmm. swimming? lalalaaaaa ya i noe..doesn't seem like it. hahaha!
Favourite Day of the Week: friday saturday sunday!! guess y? :p
Favourite Ice Cream: movenpick strawberry!!! :D

Current Mood: nothing much la. hahhaha. juz in the relieveing friendster days mood?
Current Taste: erm... aftertaste of curry puff? haha cuz tts wat i ate for breakfast.
Current Clothes: home clothes lo?
Current Desktop: some windows de laa. using my bro's accnt ma... or else will have been the sotong fishsee desktop!! ^^
Current Toenail Colour: haven't go n polish!! wahahha... soon soon... :p
Current Time: 10.06am! sunday morninggggggggg!!
Current Annoyance: i hafta do hsework later!! cnnt slack infrnt of comp all day! -_-'''
Current Thoughts: 'just wth r u up to?'

First Best Friend: bifeng? hahaha. some pri sch friend i lost touch with alrdy
First Crush: cnnt rmb... ok dun laugh......royce? hahahha.
First Movie: erm... dun rmb le laaaa
First Lie: dunooooooooooooooo
First Music: *twinkle twinkle little star* HAHA. wat dd u expect??

Last Cigarette: I HATE SMOKE.
Last Drink: plain water ba
Last Car Ride: can't rmb le!! public transport counted? haha took mrt home last nite!! -_-'''
Last Crush: lalalaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa. wat makes u tink i will say? hahaha
Last Phone Call: erm... duno leh. shld b bert ba... to ask where is he... hahaha
Last CD played: erm. so long nv play cd le. mp3 can? beautiful love!!! :D

Have you ever dated one of your best friends: dated mab? goodness. dated beavan? GOODNESS.
Have you ever broken the law: hahah yesss. i tink broke the same law as bert! lol.
Have you ever been arrested: no no. i'm an intelligent law breaker! lol.
Have you ever skinny dipped: nahhh.
Have you ever kissed someone you don't know: goodness no. y wld i?


wahhh? finish le ar? haha didn't even realised! lol.

blah! forget to add something... dun gimme softtoys!! or mummy will throw them into the cold chamber! hahaha.

ohhh yah. watched the england match last nite!! hahaha. just to watch rooney? lol. heavans no. actually i was waiting for my hair to dry n was in the mood for soccer. n they spoiled my mood. cuz they played so lousily. n i officially proclaim tt rooney is no longer cute. wahahaha. no sportsmanship de! booooooooo. hahaha ok. nvm there's always kaka! yayyyy~ :p diao -_-''' lol. nwaes. watched halfway then dozed off. cuz it was too boring le. hahahha. england is damn lousy. lalalaaa. then i ended up going to slp at 80+ min... cuz i knew it wasn't ending anytime soon. lalalaaa~ n france woonnnnnnnn. altho i'm puzzled why. oh wells. nvm... it's FRANCE~!!! lalala~ :))

bahhhhh. i'm bored! hahaha

yayyy! went out with mab bert ernie today!! grew fatter again... muahaha! saw zab!! yayness(ec)! hahaha. happy daeeeeeee! :))

click 'about' to see my wishlist! my bdae is 2mnths1day away!! -hint hint-

i'm gonna miss shirley!! :((