Replace your bad memories with new sweet ones :)

In an attempt to look for pretty note paper to scribble a note for some friends, I overturned my whole drawer, which was cluttered with letters, postcards, and notes. Out of the mugging boredom, I decided to take a peek at the not-too-ancient writings :)

I probably never mentioned this before, but I have a thing for handwritten/handmade notes and cards! Hehe. Although few people send letter by snail mail nowadays as compared to when I was in secondary school, receiving those handwritten/handmade cards (don't have to be snail-mailed la haha) still makes me happy! :) I think they are somewhat more lasting than electronic greetings via emails, Facebook, sms, etc... (Although I don't deny falling prey to posting electronic greetings more too nowadays haha oops) I'll definitely keep my paper greetings and letters!! :) :) Can't say the same about electronic greetings though.. Haha.

Not that I don't cherish such greetings.. In fact, when I was in JC, I used to print out any touching/meaningful emails or greetings that I received, or any me-directed blog entries, and store them carefully with the rest of the handwritten letters. But I guess it just got tiring after awhile, and there either wasn't enough ink or time. I do try to keep my best to store them nicely in the Inbox or save them in a certain folder or something. But technology, being more likely to err than human, tend to wipe them off when the computer crashes or the Inbox is full. I mean, if there was a fire (touchwood), I could just grab my drawer and run out of the house. But if the computer crashes or The Darn Phone gets sent to SE Repair Centre countless times, I can't keep telling it to save my precious momentos, yea?

Haha. Anyways, that was besides the point!

... On top of the pile were mostly notes and cards from my lovely! Without setting a new world record, reading them brings a half-grin half-smile yet again =D Close to two years of memories may not seem alot to many, but to me, its sufficient to last and keep me going for a lifetime :)

There was a handmade card from my beloved cousin too. I remembered being very touched to receive it coz I knew she put in a lot of effort making it! :) She was P6 then, and it was really like those cards we made in primary school art class! Hehe. So sweet of her. I remembering telling deardear how happy I was, and how handmade cards always touched me. And he asked "so if I had made you a card when I was wooing you, no matter how ugly it were, you would have been touched?" -.- Hahaha. Sadly, the answer is yes. Perhaps I should have waited for it to happen huh =P

And then further down the pile were cards and notes from the different manics and xian&SS's trademark birthday cards which always made me want to laugh at their disparity. She'll fill up the whole card with some story promoting how important she is, and sometimes me (haha), then He, the infamous Man of Few Words, would take up one tiny little corner, "Happy Birthday to you!" and sign his huge signature. Hahaha. And there were other notes from the manics too, mostly in different shades of pink. I seriously think they are the clique that super overly endorse my pinkiness. Hahaha.

There were some notes from the dans too, mostly yuyu deadear :) :) and Jess's handmade notorious card/bookmark(?) (fortunately not the lifetime membership ones wahaha). Haha. On an out-of-point side note, Jess, your glass test-tube of grapeseeds is still perched precariously on the top of my book shelf hahaa.

Then there was a somewhat crumpled Lego plastic bag, which I kind of hesitated to open. Those were the writings received in the bad bad period of life. I had threw most of the Y-related stuff away or returned them to him at that time (Yea, I'm the kind who needs a clean refreshing restart to heal, and without any physical reminders). But I didn't want to forget the emotional support I received which really pulled me up, so I kept those writings from my beloved friends, all tucked into a plastic bag. Ernie, remember the OK pen postcard? Hahaha. And there was one from Bert too, which I had to laugh at his erm, handwriting =X Oops. Hard to decipher leh~ Hahaa.

Then there were two letters from gaigai too... which I recall almost wanting to throw them away too in hurt and anger. But I had held them above the rubbish chute for awhile after throwing the Y-stuff down, and eventually still brought them back home in tears. Of course I ain't a saint, so I squashed them into the Lego plastic bag together with the cards, and tucked them away without looking anymore. Almost four years later, I'm reading them again, and realised how much you had really treasured our friendship despite the ugly incident. I guess it took a fair amount of courage for you to do that too, and worse still, having it all ended up in a mess. Not that I'm in greater approval now of what you two did, but I'm at least able to view our friendship not so tangled amidst that incident anymore. More importantly, I think we have both grown from four years ago, and seen and experienced better things and better people. I daresay we're both happier than the sorry state four years ago, right? :) Girl, it's not the end yet, the right happiness will drop by you at the right time! :) :)

And I can only say, who would have thought so much have changed since that fateful night? I went to bed in tears, hating Y for having ruined my life and my happiness. I swore that I'd be strong and I'd be happier than you. I don't know how much of it has been fulfilled now, but it doesn't matter to me anymore. More than often, I've looked back and been thankful. Yes, thankful. Thankful for an ending to the relationship that looking back, had really no chance of working out. But I'm thankful it ended, albeit very badly, and allowed me a real go at real happiness. I not only found a new bestie :) :) but I also saw my real true friends, and finally found the one that I want to spend my life with. I've grown up too and matured, and learnt how to better deal with a relationship as well. I've learnt too that the dissolution may for all, wasn't entirely your fault as I used to so firmly believe; there were just so many value differences and character mismatch between us, though I still think I rock! Hahaha. -_-'''

I've replaced my bad memories with new, sweet ones. Thank you, my dear friends for the immense support through these years... The lucky blur girl has finally found her happiness to last! :) :)


It takes time, but we can stop crying from the hurt. According to Meimei (2009), Good things fall apart so better things can fall together! :) The hurt will fade one day, and we'll all emerge happier and wiser than before.

Replace your bad memories with new sweet ones too! =)